Regretting What I Said

From: * (Adam Schneider)
Subject: /l/christine_lavin/*


"REGRETTING WHAT I SAID TO YOU WHEN YOU CALLED ME 11:00 ON A FRIDAY
MORNING TO TELL ME THAT AT 1:00 FRIDAY AFTERNOON YOU WERE GONNA LEAVE
YOUR OFFICE, GO DOWNSTAIRS, HAIL A CAB TO GO OUT TO THE AIRPORT TO
CATCH A PLANE TO GO SKIING IN THE ALPS FOR TWO WEEKS; NOT THAT I
WANTED TO GO WITH YOU, I WASN'T ABLE TO LEAVE TOWN, I'M NOT A VERY
GOOD SKIER, I COULDN'T EXPECTYOU TO PAY MY WAY, BUT AFTER GOING OUT
WITH YOU FOR THREE YEARS, I DON'T LIKE SURPRISES: A MUSICAL APOLOGY"
 ------------------------------------------------------------------ 

[Yes, that's really the title of the song.]
[Actually in F; capo 5.]
[Use the tablature at the end of this file for chord fingerings
 and picking pattern.]


[spoken:] In this song, I attempt to take back everything I said while
          standing in a phone booth on the corner of 49th and 3rd.

[Intro: arpeggio C chord.]

         C              E          Am                Am/G
I didn't mean it when I said I hope the cable in the elevator
Fmaj7      Fmaj7       C      G
snaps when you step on board
           E              E          Am            Am
And I was joking when I said I hope you crack your head
And get mangled by the downstairs revolving door

         C               E          Am            Am/G
And I was kidding when I said I hope the number 103 bus
F                F              C    G
Hits and makes a pancake out of you
    Am    Am      E     E
I'm sorry,    I'm sorry
          F              G                 C    G
Isn't it amazing what a woman in love will do?

And I don't really want to see your taxi on the 59th street bridge
Flip over and crash through the rail
And I'd feel bad if at the airport you were mistaken for a local
   sex offender
Arrested, beaten up, and thrown in jail

And I really don't want to see you getting radiation poisoning from
   the metal detector
That all passengers on foreign and domestic flights must walk through
I'm sorry, forgive me
For all the mean things I said to you

E               E             Am     Am
  You thought I didn't have a temper
   E           E            Am     Am
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, surprise
      E                    E                   Am               Am
But I really don't want to see you dismembered by the marijuana-
   sniffing dogs
When a simple little nipping would suffice, would suffice

And I'm sorry that I said I hope the plane explodes in mid-air
As it carries you away from me
And I'm sorry that I said I hope you break both legs
On the mountain while you ski

And I'm sorry for all the nasty things I said about your mother
Even though we both know they're true
    Am     Am     E      E
I'm sorry,    forgive me
    Am              Am               E             E
I'm swallowing my pride, I'd feel so guilty if you died
Oh I'm sorry, but I'm still mad at you.


TAB:

[This tablature isn't _exactly_ what Christine plays in any
 particular verse; it's a combination of what I thought were the
 best-sounding parts from all the verses.]
  C                E                Am               Am/G
E ------0---------|------0---------|------0---------|------0---------| 

B 1---------1-----|0---------0-----|1---------1-----|1---------------|
G ----------------|----------------|----------------|----------2-----| 
D ----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------0---| 

A 3-------3-------|--------2-------|0-------0-------|----------------|
E ----------------|0---------------|----------------|3-------3-------| 

...mean it when I said I hope       the cable in the elevator
  Fmaj7            Fmaj7            C                G
E ----------------|------0---------|------0---------|------3---------| 

B 1---------1-----|--1-------1-----|--1-------1-----|0---------0-----|
G ------2---------|--------------2-|--------------0-|----------------| 
D ----3-------3---|----3-------3---|----2-------0---|----0-------3---| 
A --------3-------|--------3-------|3-------3-------|----------------| 

E 1---------------|1---------------|----------------|3-------3-------|
  snaps      when you step on board;                         And I was
  E                E                Am               Am
E ----------------|------0---------|----------------|----------------| 
B --0-------0-----|--0-------0-----|--1-------0-----|0=1-------0-----| 
G ------1-------1-|--------------1-|------2---------|------2---------| 
D ----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------0---| 
A --------2-------|--------2-------|0-------0-------|0-------0-------| 

E 0---------------|0---------------|----------------|----------------|
  joking when I said            I hope you crack your head    and get
  D/A              D/A              G       Gsus     G5
E ------2---------|2---------------|----------------|----------------| 

B 3---------------|------3---------|--0-------1-----|3---------------|
G ----------2-----|----------2-----|------0-------0-|0---------------| 
D ----0-------0---|----0-------0---|----0-------0---|0---------------| 

A 0-------0-------|0-------0-------|----------------|----------------|
E ----------------|----------------|3-------3-------|3---------------| 

mangled by the downstairs revolving door;                    And I was
  C                E                Am               Am/G
E ------0---------|------0---------|------0---------|------0---------| 

B 1---------1-----|0---------0-----|1---------1-----|--1-------1-----|
G ----------------|----------------|----------------|----------------| 
D ----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------0---| 


  kidding when I said I hope   the    number 1 - 0 - 3  bus
  F                                 C                G
E ----1-----------|----------------|----------------|------3---------| 

B 1---1-----------|----------------|--1-------1-----|0---------0-----|
G ----2-----------|----------------|------0-------0-|----------------| 
D ----3-----------|----------------|----2-------2---|----0-------0---| 
A ----3-----------|----------------|3-------3-------|----------------| 

E 1---1-----------|----------------|----------------|3------(3)------|
  hits and makes a pancake out of you;
  Am               Am               E                E
E ----------------|----------------|--------------0-|----------------| 
B --1-------1-----|0=1-------1-----|--0-------0-----|--0-------0-----| 
G ------2-------2-|------2-------2-|------1---------|------1-------1-| 
D ----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------2---| 

A 0-------0-------|0-------0-------|--------2-------|--------2-------|
E ----------------|----------------|0---------------|0---------------| 

I'm sorry;                       Forgive me;                  Isn't it
  F                G                C                G
E ----------------|----------------|----------------|------3---------| 
B --1-------1-----|--0-------0-----|--1-------1-----|--0-------0-----| 
G ------2-------0-|------0-------0-|------0-------0-|----------------| 
D ----3-------3---|----0-------0---|----2-------2---|----0-------0---| 
A --------3-------|----------------|3-------3-------|--------0-------| 

E 1---------------|3-------3-------|----------------|3---------------|
 amazing what a woman in love will do?

  E                E                Am               Am
E 0---------------|----------------|--------------0-|----------------|
B 0---------------|----------------|--1-------1-----|--1-------------|
G 1---------------|----------------|------2---------|------2---------|
D 2---------------|----------------|----2-------2---|----2-------2---|
A 2---------------|----------------|0-------0-------|0-------0-------|
E 0---------------|----------------|----------------|----------------|
      You thought I didn't have a temper;                        Ha
  E                E                Am               Am
E ----------------|------0---------|--------------0-|----------------| 
B ----------0-----|--0-------0-----|--1------(1)----|----------------| 
G ------1-------1-|----------------|------2---------|------2---2-----| 
D ----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------2---| 
A --------2-------|--------2-------|0-------0-------|0------(0)------| 

E 0---------------|0---------------|----------------|----------------|
  ha  ha  ha  ha   ha  ha  ha,  surprise!                      But I
  E                E                Am               Am
E ----------------|----------------|----------------|----------------| 
B --0-----------0-|--0-------0-----|--1-------1-----|--1-------1-----| 
G ------1---2-----|------1-------1-|------2-------2-|------2---------| 
D ----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------2---|----2-------0---| 
A --------2-------|--------2-------|0-------0-------|0-------0-------| 

E 0---------------|0---------------|----------------|----------------|
really don't want to see you dismembered by the marijuana-sniffing dogs
  D/A              D/A              G       Gsus     G5
E ----------------|----------------|----------------|----------------| 

B 3---------3-----|--3-------3-----|0-------1-------|3---------------|
G ------2---------|------2---------|0-------0-------|0---------------| 
D ----0-------0---|----0-------0---|----0-------0---|0---------------| 

A 0-------0-------|0-------0-------|[*|----------------|
E ----------------|----------------|3-------3-------|3---------------| 

when a simple little nipping would suffice, would suffice

- Adam Schneider, *