Im Gonna Kill Santa Claus

C                 Em
Every Christmas I'm a very good boy
Am                             G
I put out milk and cookies for this guy to enjoy
C              Em
But Santa never brings the right toy
 Am                               G
I felt like giving up on all this holiday joy
C                      Em
But if you've seen 'The Santa Clause' you know (you know)
Am                      G
You become Santa if you put on Santa's coat (oh)
C                           Em
You can kill him, leave him dead up in the snow
  Am                                G
The elves don't even care about you murdering their bro
And so

[Pre-Chorus 1]
C                      Em
This Christmas gon' be special to me
Am                      G
I ain't gonna ask for a car with a key
C                            Em
I ain't gonna write to Santa asking him, "Please"
      Am                                   G
'Cause what I want for Christmas can't fit under the tree

[Chorus]
C          Em
I wanna be Santa Claus
Am                G
So I'm gonna kill Santa Claus
C                 Em
When I hear those reindeer paws
Am        G
I'm gonna break the law
     C                      Em               Am
This Christmas, don't got a wishlist, I got a hit list
           G                      C
And at the top of it is old Saint Nicholas
         Em                    Am
Nothing against him, it's just business
            G                          C
I ain't the Grinch but I'm gonna steal Christmas

[Verse 2]
         Em
I made a list and checked it twice
    Am                         G
For all the fucks I give about ending Santa's life
      C
And I found none
           Em
I'll travel at the speed of light
       Am                              G
If I'm Santa now does that mean that I sleep with Santa's wife?
           C
'Cause I'm down, son (Yeah)
   Em
Fire in my fireplace
     Am                                 G
Not talking 'bout this flying ship when I say I'mma slay
        C
He gon' die, son
      Em
I'mma wake up Christmas day
     Am                             G
With all the dopest presents that I forced the elves to make
           C
They're my prisoners

[Pre-Chorus 2]
                Em
I'll never understand why this is
    Am                                G
The way that they decide who the next Santa Claus is
C                              Em
How do people not believe that Santa exists?
        Am                              G                                C
In this world, aren't adults concerned about all these gifts they didn't buy?

[Chorus]
           Em
I wanna be Santa Claus
Am                G
So I'm gonna kill Santa Claus
C                 Em
When I hear those reindeer paws
Am        G
I'm gonna break the law
     C                      Em               Am
This Christmas, don't got a wishlist, I got a hit list
           G                      C
And at the top of it is old Saint Nicholas
         Em                    Am
Nothing against him, it's just business
            G                          C
I ain't the Grinch but I'm gonna steal Christmas