Why Dont Women Like Me

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INTRO G A7 D G

G                             Em      C        A
Now I know I'm  not handsome, no good looks or wealth
        D7                                   Em     C          G
But the girls I chase say my plain face will compro-mise their health .
G                  Em            C              A7
Now I know fellows worse than me bow-legged and boss-eyed
A                A7           A        Em       D
Walking out with lovely women clinging to their side.
       G          Em        G        Em     G         A7    D    G
Now if women like them like men like those, why don't women like me?

C                G              A7              Em         C        D
Look at EMP'D SS Josephine, the most attractive women that EVER was seen,
G            Em        C    G                           D7
Yet Napoleon short and fat, captivates a lovely looking dame like that
       G          Em        G        Em     G         A7    D    G       E7
Now if women like them like men like those, why don't women like me? Hey Hey
A7       D          G
Why dont women like me?

G                     Em          C          A7      A
Last night I went out walking, my intentions were to click
        D                   D7                G      C       G
But the sights I saw whilst walking out, they nearly made me sick.
               Em        C        A7               A
I must admit I saw  some girls, a-ttractive little dears
A                A7             A    Em     D
Arm in arm  with ugly men with  cauliflower ears.
       G          Em        G        Em     G         A7    D    G
Now if women like them like men like those, why don't women like me?

C            G              A7                   Em               D
What can the attraction be, thats the thing that always starts to worry me.
   G               Em    C         G                        C          D
Al-though I havent got a bean, Ive got a lot of things that girls have never seen.
       G          Em        G        Em     G         A7    D    G       E7
Now if women like them like men like those, why don't women like me? Hey Hey
A7       D          G
Why dont women like me?

G                 Em             C          A7  A
Now I went for my holidays, down to the gay sea-side
  D            D7                 G      C      G
I saw a lot of things there being hidden by the tide
            Em           C          A7               A
The way the women jumped around the men there in the sea
                   A7               A           Em       D7
Made me think that there is still a good chance left for me

        G          Em        G        Em     G         A7    D    G
*Coz if women like them like men like those, why don't women like me?

   C                  G            A7                                 D
Of all the shapes and sizes there, Ive got a chance of clicking yes I do declare
G                   Em   C       G                     C       Em    D
Tho'I don't want to be a nark, I saw a lot of things below the water-mark

       G          Em        G        Em     G         A7    D    G       E7
Now if women like them like men like those, why don't women like me? Hey Hey
A7       D          G
Why dont women like me? **

G  O : Play chords thru from part marked * to part marked  ** (embelish as you wish)

G                 Em        G        Em     G         A7    D    G
Now if women like them like men like those, why don't women like me?

C                G               Em                        D7
Take Lord Nelson with  one limb, Lady William Hamilton she fell for him .
G                    Em  C             G            C             Em      D
With one eye and one arm gone west,she ran like the devil and she grabbed the rest.
       G          Em        G        Em     G         A7    D    G       E7
Now if women like them like men like those, why don't women like me? Hey Hey!
A7       D          G    D G
Why dont women like me?  ! !