The Hopelessly Optimistic Flightless Bird Song

       C      OR       C               F               G
E|-| B-|---|---|   |-B-|---|---|   |-B-|---|---|   |-B-|---|---| 

 |-B-|---|-B-|   |-B-|---|-O-|   |-B-|---|---|   |-B-|---|---|
 |-B-|---|-B-|   |-B-|---|-O-|   |-B-|-O-|---|   |-B-|-O-|---|
 |-B-|---|-B-|   |-B-|---|-O-|   |-B-|---|-O-|   |-B-|---|-O-|
 |-B-|---|---|   |-B-|---|---|   |-B-|---|-O-|   |-B-|---|-O-|
X|---|---|---|  X|---|---|---|   |-B-|---|---|   |-B-|---|---|
   3                                               3
      Am              Em              Dm
o|---|---|---|  o|---|---|---|  o|-O-|---|---|
 |-O-|---|---|  o|---|---|---|   |---|---|-O-|
E|---|-| O-|---|  o|---|---|---|   |---|-O-|---| 
B|---|-| O-|---|   |---|-O-|---|  o|---|---|---| 

o|---|---|---|   |---|-O-|---|  X|---|---|---|
X|---|---|---|  o|---|---|---|  X|---|---|---|



Intro:

C F G G x2


Verse 1:
C       F       G
Here we see the Bearded Cardinal
       C      F   G
in his native habitat -Welcome to the Walmart parking lot
C       F         G
Coolin' off, beneath the shade
      C   F    G
of a '92 Cadillac -Could life get any better?


Bridge(One hit and strum before change):
              Am
But there's a sad truth
       Em
like a flower that won't blossom
Dm
he'll never do the one thing
           Am
that makes being a bird awesome...
Am
Unlike his bird brethren
Em
traversing the sky
Dm                  Knock guitar 3 times
the Bearded Cardinal
               Am
will never fly...



Verse 3(Steve talking):

STOP

-Excuse me,I'm sorry, I couldn't help but overhear
did you say I can't fly?

-Yeah.

-You're the Bearded Cardinal,
a flightless bird.

-You know what?I'm cool with that.In fact, I see it as a positive!
I want to sing about it...

Verse 4(Hit Every chord 4 times):
            C
I got a big beak
            F
feathers on fleek
       G
I keep cool in the heat by
                      C
flapping my vestigial wings.
            C
I'm down to Earth,
               F
In fact I hate heights.
G
Who needs working wings
                 C
when you're this fly?
C
I regurgitate meals
              F
into my kids/ mouths...
            G
I never get sucked into a jet
                     C
or hit the side of a house...
                      C
Here comes a shopping cart
                 F
at a pretty high speed
           G
If I was a bettin' bird
                               C
I'd bet the carts about to hit me...


Outro(Hit every chord once and let it fade):

Am
Ohhhhhh  -It did
Em
Ohhhhhh  -It hurts
Dm
Ohhhhhhhhhhhh
Am
Ohhhhhhhhhhhh