[Intro] C E F G

C           E        F         G
This is the story of our first teacher
C                 E
Shetland made her jumpers
F                      G
And the devil made her features
C            E             F            G
Threw up her hands when my mum said our names
C           E               F               G
Embroidered all her stories with slanderous claims

C E F G
It's over and done with...


This is the story of losing my virginity
I held my breath and the bed held a trinity
People I'm making no claims to no mystery
But sometimes it feel like
My sex lifes all history

It's over and done with...

C                           E
I'm not saying these events didn't

Touch our lives in any way
C                             G
But, ah, they didn't make the impression

That some people say

This is the story of watching a man dying
The subjects unpopular
But I don't feel like lying
When I think of it now I acted like a sinner
I just washed my hands
Then I went for my dinner

C E F G
It's over and done with...